A Resilience Tree Leadership Fable
Ember Daniels was a rising leader in her organization, known for her passion and vision. When she spoke, people leaned in. Her energy was magnetic, she could spark excitement in a room and ignite new ideas with ease.
But lately, Ember felt her fire flickering.
Her days were full of back-to-back meetings, urgent deadlines, and the constant hum of competing priorities. She still burned brightly in public, but in private she was exhausted. At night, she lay awake, replaying conversations and worrying if she had done enough.
One afternoon, after another tense meeting where her ideas were dismissed, Ember sat alone in her office staring at her reflection in the dark computer screen. Her chest was tight.
“Why does it feel like I’m always fighting?” she whispered.
She thought back to her childhood, when her grandfather would build campfires. He taught her that fire could either warm and guide, or scorch and destroy. “It’s not about how big the fire is,” he once said, “but how you tend it.”
For the first time in months, Ember paused. She realized she had been trying to blaze without stopping to add wood, shield the flames, or clear the smoke. She was burning herself out.
A Turning Point
The next day, Ember decided to make a shift. Instead of rushing into meetings ready to prove herself, she began to listen first. She noticed when her frustration rose and took deep breaths instead of reacting. She set aside time each week to reflect, asking herself: What fueled me this week? What drained me?
Slowly, the flames of her leadership changed. They became steadier, more focused. Her team no longer felt the heat of her burnout but the warmth of her clarity.
One colleague pulled her aside after a presentation and said, “You didn’t just light us up, you gave us direction.”
Ember smiled. She was learning that leadership wasn’t about burning the brightest; it was about tending the fire so it could last.
✍🏽 Journal Reflection Prompts
🔥 Your Fire
- What fuels your passion for leadership?
- Where do you feel your fire flickering or burning too hot?
🌬️ Tending the Flame
- What practices help you regulate your energy (breathing, reflection, exercise, boundaries)?
- Where do you need to clear “smoke” (distractions, resentment, overcommitment)?
🕯️ Leading with Warmth
- How can you bring light and clarity to others without burning yourself out?
- What would it look like to lead from a steady flame rather than a frantic blaze?
🗣️ Discussion Prompts for Groups
- Ember’s grandfather said, “It’s not about how big the fire is, but how you tend it.”
- What does this mean for leadership in high-pressure environments?
- What does this mean for leadership in high-pressure environments?
- Think of a time when you were on fire; inspired, productive, energized.
- What conditions allowed that flame to thrive?
- What conditions allowed that flame to thrive?
- What are some practical ways teams and organizations can prevent burnout while still pursuing excellence?
Grow Your Resilience Tree
If this resonates, check out my book: Resilience Tree: A Model for Women Leaders of Color and Those Who Support Them Now Available on in paperback and audio:
Nurture your roots. Rise with purpose. Let’s grow together.
Written by Dr. Shauna T. Sobers, Creator of the Resilience Tree www.shaunatsobers.com#Resilience #Leadership #Followership #ResilienceTree #LivingTheResilienceTree #WomenLeadersOfColor #EmpoweringYou #WomenLeaders #LeadershipDevelopment #PersonalGrowth #EmotionalWellbeing
Drafting assistance provided by OpenAI’s ChatGPT. The thoughts & stories are my own.