A Resilience Tree Leadership Fable
Marisol had always been someone people relied on.
At work, she was the one who stayed late to help others finish projects. In her community, she volunteered, mentored, and showed up, again and again. People often told her how strong she was, how dependable.
But there were moments, quiet ones, when Marisol wondered who she could rely on.
It wasn’t that she didn’t have people in her life. It was that she wasn’t always sure who truly saw her.
That began to change the year she met Elena.
Elena was direct in a way that surprised Marisol. During a team meeting, after Marisol had downplayed her own idea, Elena pulled her aside and said, “You keep offering solutions, but then you shrink them before anyone else can respond. Why?”
Marisol didn’t have an answer.
But Elena didn’t leave it there. She invited Marisol to sit with her in meetings, asked her to speak first, and followed up afterward with feedback that was honest but never dismissive.
Around the same time, Marisol reconnected with her college friend Jordan, who had always believed in her—even when she doubted herself. Jordan would send messages out of the blue: “You’re doing more than you think. Don’t forget that.”
And then there was her aunt, who didn’t work in Marisol’s field but had a way of asking questions that made everything clearer. “Are you doing this because it matters to you,” she asked once, “or because it matters to everyone else?”
Each of these people showed up differently.
Elena challenged her to take up space.
Jordan reminded her of her worth.
Her aunt grounded her in what mattered.
Marisol began to realize that support didn’t look one way. It wasn’t always loud encouragement or constant presence. Sometimes it was a well-timed question. Sometimes it was accountability. Sometimes it was simply someone who refused to let her forget who she was becoming.
There were also relationships she had to reconsider.
There were people who only called when they needed something. People who praised her reliability but never asked how she was doing. People who were comfortable with her staying small.
Letting distance grow in those relationships was not easy. It felt unfamiliar to not always be available.
But as she made space, something shifted.
The people who remained, and the new ones she allowed in, formed a different kind of network. One that didn’t just depend on her, but supported her.
For the first time, Marisol understood that resilience was not only about how much she could carry.
It was also about who was standing with her.
Reflection Prompts
Recognizing Your Branches
- Who are the people in your life who truly see you and your potential?
- Who challenges you to grow, even when it’s uncomfortable?
- Who reminds you of who you are when you begin to doubt yourself?
Evaluating Your Support System
- Are there relationships where you feel mostly relied on but not supported?
- Where might you need to create distance or redefine boundaries?
Strengthening Your Branches
- What kind of support do you need more of right now (encouragement, honesty, advocacy, connection)?
- Who could you intentionally reach out to or reconnect with?
Giving and Receiving
- In what ways do you show up as a branch for others?
- How comfortable are you with receiving support in return?
Grow Your Resilience Tree
If this resonates, check out my book: Resilience Tree: A Model for Women Leaders of Color and Those Who Support Them Now Available on in paperback and audio:
Nurture your roots. Rise with purpose. Let’s grow together.
Written by Dr. Shauna T. Sobers, Creator of the Resilience Tree www.shaunatsobers.com#Resilience #Leadership #Followership #ResilienceTree #LivingTheResilienceTree #WomenLeadersOfColor #EmpoweringYou #WomenLeaders #LeadershipDevelopment #PersonalGrowth #EmotionalWellbeing
Drafting assistance provided by OpenAI’s ChatGPT. The thoughts & stories are my own.